Incurable

*This post is in no way meant to make fun of or light of an actual incurable disease.


It's true. I've been diagnosed (self-diagnosed) as having "non-nutritional sedentarism (NNS)." It's said a person with this disease craves foods high in fat and deliciousness. A person with NNS also struggles daily with thoughts of exercising but not actually following through.

This describes me. I have NNS and I'm not ashamed to admit it. I've heard there are cures but, I question if they really work.

Some of the symptoms I experience:
I see flat stomachs and feel a jealousy deep inside...I remember when I had a flat stomach oh so long ago. I look at skinny people now and want to hurt or maim them - I mean hug them. :)

I wonder why I let this happen. I don't enjoy having a belly. There you go, I said it, I have a belly. I often squish it and think if I had extra money and could tolerate pain I'd get a tummy tuck... I also have boobs. I hate them. Shirts don't fit right. I miss being a 34B. My sister says I'll hate it when I lose weight and my boobs disappear. I don't think so. I'll be able to wear button up tops again!

Have you ever tried Spanx? I have. They are like torture chambers squeezing your belly into your other internal organs. When I wear them (rarely because I don't tolerate pain or discomfort well) I look good but struggle to carry on a conversation because the only thing going through my mind is the fact that I'm being squeezed to death. How do people wear those everyday?

I feel like I'll always have NNS. I feel like it is incurable. Why can't I have motivation to workout and eat well?

Sharing this with you is hard. I may not be able to cure my NNS but, I hope to find a way to live with it. I hope to find the motivation I need to get fit so I can eliminate the muffin from the top of my pants. I hope that by my being open and honest that you too can find the sympathy for others struggling with NNS. If you think you might have this disease. You are not alone.